the jazz man

i've been eye fucking someone.

the one beautiful man at my work that i had never met... until tonight.

i happened to be leaving at the same time he was. he noticed me, standing beside him at the intersection. and i wanted to look so badly because he is oh so beautiful, but i was not about to give it away. he wasn't doing too good of a job hiding it himself. but that's flattery for you.

since our stop was closed tonight, we had to walk to the next station. side by side. on a pretty much empty street.

and he finally broke the silence.

"you work at t----, right?" without even really making eye contact. was he nervous?

"yeah"

"i've seen you around. what department are you in? where are you from?"

what a relief. i feel like i'm usually the one asking the questions..

i stick out my hand for a formal introduction. he spits out his name. which i of course knew already.

he's tripping on his words. i'm really comfortable. i tell him about the movie i just saw. he seems genuinely interested. we talk about people we know. about our home towns.

and then i went out on a whim.

and asked if he wanted to have a drink. then and there.

response:

frowny face (wishful thinking?)

"ummm. i'm actually going to my girlfriend's. she's having a party."

what? why have you been eye fucking me for the past four months then? you idiot.

we get to the next stop. but i'd rather keeping walking.

he says goodnight. and then mutters, "i'll take you up on that drink soon."

how inappropriate. you sleeze.

i don't respond and keep on walking.

i liked you more before i met you.